farm town

I’m not cutout to be a virtual superhero

It started over a year ago. A dear friend called me in a panic and the terror in her voice was apparent. “Please help me!” she said, her tone quivering with impending danger.
“Anything! What do you need?” I said trying to calm her down. I knew she was out of town and figured she was stranded somewhere. Uneasy about the tiny size of my bank account, I crossed my fingers that she didn’t need money.
Since this was a phone call, I wasn’t worried about it being some kind of hacker, who pretends to be a friend and says they’re stuck in England and needs thousands to get home. I’ve had those kind of text messages and emails and had the fortune to recognize it for what it was: a scam. No, I knew her voice and, besides, my cell showed that her phone number was correct. No, this wasn’t a scam, my friend was in serious trouble. My husband, who’d been making dinner, came out of the kitchen, hearing the concern in my voice, and put a reassuring hand on my shoulder.
“What is it?” his eyes said.
“I don’t know,” my eyes replied.
I waited with bated breath for my friend to explain her dilemma…

“My crops are about to wither and I can’t get internet access here!” she cried. I was relieved and somewhat bewildered. I bit my lip to keep from belting out a huge guffaw. We were Farmville neighbors so I knew what she meant. She gave me her Facebook password and I resolved her problem.
Over the past year, I’ve become a VirtualHero for some dozen or so friends who’ve had similar panic attacks. I’ve even received emails from one friend or another asking if I could tend their crops, or whatever, while they were on vacation.
Armed with superhuman strength, I’ve supplied my talents to feeding virtual fish, petting SuperPets, sending back gifts, completing quests–you name it–if its a game on Facebook, I’ve helped out.
Which brings me to the inevitable question: Why hasn’t some enterprising go-getter, started a business for this? If there’s a need, there’s always a business created to fill it. Right?

There is definitely a need. There are entire websites dedicated to Farmville addicts. Dr. Phil even did a TV show about it.  Wired magazine posted about executives excusing themselves from a meeting because their crops were about to wither. We’ve all heard about these game addicts, some of us are addicts ourselves. Even if you don’t play the game, you’d have to be a hermit if you’ve never heard of it.

When Harold Camping proclaimed that the Rapture would occur on May 21st, enterprising atheists set up websites offering services to take care of your pets in case you weren’t around to do it. Don’t believe me? See Eternal-Earthbound-Pets or After the Rapture Pet Care. So, why isn’t there a business setup to help these panicked gamers?
It’s not as though my idea is very original. I mean, Farm Town already allows you to hire others to harvest for you, and gives you 25 percent more profit to boot. But, still, you actually have to BE on your farm to hire them.
This morning I spent a few hours Googling for Facebook game assistance businesses, but the closest I could find was automation software for Farmville.

Farmville Automizer:

“The key to getting everything you want in Farmville is not to play for outrageous amounts of hours but to maximize your profits by using automation software.”

Also with extra plugins to fertilize your neighbors crops and lots more. (Cost is $27) The software, however, is for windows users only so I couldn’t try it out without logging out of my Mac and firing up Bootcamp, a chore I really hate because Windows takes so long to load.
Another one is Bot for Farmville: Bot will plant and harvest crops, plow, harvest trees, help neighbors, harvest buildings and animals. You can also add more tasks by adding the plugins. It also is a PC-only software, but it says its free.
There are also websites offering ghost posting services for businesses and celebrities on Facebook, Twitter, and Linkedin.
The need is definitely out there. I, however, would never think of charging my friends for these services. Nor, would I want to offer the services. I play Farmville too much any way. Lately, I sign on just to send friends gifts and even that’s too much.
With a little bit of programming knowledge, such a service shouldn’t take that much time. A programmer could even adapt existing Firefox or Greasemonkey plugins to handle a lot of the work. Some extensions are: Clean my Wall, Facebook Mass Accept, Boost (automatically poke anyone who pokes you), not to mention all the grabber bars for collecting prizes for all the different games.
I do have some tips for any programmer who wants to make a few bucks and come up with such a service.
Number 1: is don’t get your client’s account banned. Facebook’s security setup is based on the location a user signs in from. If Facebook sees a person signing in in San Francisco California, and then seconds later, signing in in Atlanta, Georgia, Facebook will sometimes put a hold on the account. Sometimes the hold can last for as long as two hours during which time a person’s crops have withered. Some Work arounds might be: to re-write your IP address to your customer’s IP. The second work around, is a bit more convoluted. Facebook will sometimes question that the person signed in is the true owner of the account, by making you identify a random photo in a random gallery of the person. In this case, you should know have a local copy of the person’s galleries.

Number 2: Know the games for the services you offer as well as the your client does. I’ve had the unfortunate event of having “killed” an animal someone paid real cash for because I wasn’t familiar enough with the game to know a certain sequence of events to keep the animal alive. Since I was this person’s friend, she was kind and said, “oh well,” and dropped it. But, people who pay you for your services won’t be so kind. You might have to pay back the person for their loss or put some kind of statement that you’re not responsible in those kind of circumstances.
I’m sure there are a lot of programmers who could start providing such a service. It would really be a relief for over-used “friends” like myself.
I’m really not cut out to be a Virtual Superhero.

The Physics of Farm Town

Holy Cow in Black Hole

Old hats of the Facebook/MySpace game called Farm Town are familiar with this but its new to me. The geek in me finds it fascinating enough to write about it.
I think about all the years’ physicists like Stephen Hawking have been working on this and its right there on a silly facebook page. A Farm Town glitch knocks a hole in the space-time continuum. BELIEVE IT . . . OR NOT.
The glitch allows you to have unlimited dimensions on your farm. In one dimension you can have a crop of pineapples and on the same farm you can have another dimension of crops of tomatoes. These dimensions are not aware of each other, they don’t interact in any way. There are no dualities. And, almost, no rules.

Farm Town Logo

OK, stop laughing at me. In order to write this, I have to come clean and admit to being a Facebook gamer. Yikes. There’s so little time to do everything I do and yet I often find myself looking at my watch thinking, ‘Oh no, I’ve got to go harvest my (some crop here). Betty White said on her SNL debut, (Facebook) “sounds like a huge waste of time.” I actually have gotten a lot out of social networking sites, but that’s another column. I was introduced to Farm Town’s multi-dimensional universes recently, while assisting a neighbor who’d hired me to harvest her crops. Helping out in Farm Town is beneficial to both parties. Both receive cash and crops, while saving on the valuable fuel commodity. So back to my discovery over the physics of Farm Town, my overall-clad avatar was going along, minding her own business, harvesting this person’s crops when suddenly the world started disappearing. It was as though my character was being swallowed up by a black hole! Frightened, I typed, “What’s going on????!!” and my neighbor explained what Farm Towners know as “Layering Farms.”

Layering farms

Here’s the info she sent to me:

Farm #1, completely harvested and plowed.
Open farm in 2 to 4 tabs…depending on how much you wish to layer
tab 1, plant 4 day crop if you have opened 4 tabs
tab 2, plant 3 day crop if you have opened 4 tabs
tab 3, plant 2 day crop if you have opened 4 tabs
tab 4, plant 1 day crop if you have opened 4 tabs
At this time all tabs are still open
All farms are planted
At tab 1, click refresh
when the farm reopens the crop planted on the last tab..(tab 4 – 1 day crop) will be showing. Close other tabs.
When crop is ready to harvest:
harvest crop and delete fields. Refresh, crop showing should be crop planted on tab 2. Once this crop is ready to harvest, do so and then delete fields. So on, so on… After harvesting 4 day crop, plow and begin again. This can be done with all 6 farms…therefore each farm has 4 separate days worth of crop for a total of 16 harvest in 4 days.

I’ve done it with more than the 4 crops – added 8, 4, 2 hr ones sometimes if I needed them.

I tried it, and even though it’s a bit confusing, it worked the first time out. Something happened I should note for those who want to try it. When I did it, it said I had gone offline and asked if I wanted to reconnect. I took a guess and said no. I finished following the directions and it still worked. Now all I have to do is make sure that I harvest the “layers” (I much prefer my definition of alternate dimensions) before they whither. I can’t wait to see the black hole effect again.

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